Thrive in 2024: Be Polished. Be Prepared. Be Powerful.

Polish: Improve, refine, or add the finishing touches to.

Power: Ability to act or produce an effect.

Presence: A noteworthy quality of poise and effectiveness.

Countless opportunities have been lost for well-qualified individuals simply because they have not paid attention to their most visible credential—their presence. Very few credentials can compensate for a poor impression, inadequate social skills, and weak non-verbal communication. Prepare yourself to thrive in 2024 by acquiring the finely tuned social skills and polished presence needed for success in both your personal and professional life. 

A polished, powerful presence rests on three pillars:

• Appearance: How you look.

• Attitude:  How you carry yourself: your conduct, body language, and attitude.

• Actions: How you communicate, interact, and treat others.

I. Appearance:

• Your appearance remains one of the main factors that will encourage others to work with and for you. Your appearance is important, not only in first impressions, but also in ongoing interactions. It is the filter through which your talent and suitability will be evaluated. Package yourself for success!

• You should look appropriate for your environment, and authentic to you. Appropriate business attire for professional industries consists of quality fabrics and conservative styling in subdued colors. For executive positions in fashion-related industries, quality fabrics are important, but there is more latitude with styling and color. Technology firms may be more casual in their dress than most industries, but there are nevertheless certain standards to be maintained.

• You should always be well-groomed and fit.  Just as important– if not more so-than being appropriately dressed is being well-groomed.  Styled hair, well-tended nails, nice breath, clothes that are clean and pressed, shoes that are polished, etc. are a must. In fact, in a recent survey of senior leaders in the U.S., more than a third considered polish and grooming vital to a man and or woman making a good impression. And today, more emphasis is being placed on being and looking fit for a job. The workplace is more stressful today than ever. Exercising and eating right will help you meet the demands of your job, as well as add significantly to the impression you make on others.                                                                                                                                                          

 II. Attitude: Conduct/Body Language                                                           

We confirm or contradict our powerful image by using behavioral tools such as posture, engaging eye contact, a strong handshake, and a ready smile. Nonverbal cues such as stance, head movements, facial expressions, and gestures clarify out message.

• Your attitude sends signals to others how you feel about yourself, the situation, and them. The entrance you make, your eye contact, the way you shake hands, your posture, the way you introduce yourself and others, your people skills, and your business attire and accessories are all broadcasting plenty about you.                                                                                                   

• The rules for work are changing. You will be judged by a new yardstick, not just how smart you are, or by your training and expertise, but how well you handle yourself and others. According to research by Harvard University, The Carnegie Foundation, and The Stanford Research Institute, 85 percent of your success in getting a job, keeping a job, and moving up in an organization is connected to your people skills, or soft skills. Fifteen percent is based upon your technical skills or knowledge.

• Behaviors and habits that detract from making a good impression: smoking, chewing gum, biting fingernails, tugging at hair, rolling your eyes, tugging at your clothes, talking loudly in public, et cetera.

III. Actions:  How You Communicate, Interact and Treat Others

• Every verbal encounter in the real world, as well as the virtual one, is a vital opportunity to create and nurture a positive impression. Your communication skills, both verbal and non-verbal, are what ultimately win you the attention and mindshare of colleagues, clients, and friends.

• People like people who are interested in them and the world around them–not just themselves. By showing interest in others and the world around you, it shows that you are not self-absorbed, which will help you create positive impressions wherever you go. And the more well-informed you are, the more likely it is that you will have a conversation topic for each person you meet.

• Get people to talk about themselves. People like people who find them interesting. In fact, showing genuine interest is the easiest and most powerful way to make a good impression. Find out about their company. What are their interests? Find out anything that can be helpful in establishing rapport, since it is the first step in forming relationships with others.

• Show others you have similar attitudes. If you want to be favorably received, show others where you have similar attitudes. See where you agree rather than disagree.

• Learn when to talk and when to listen. What you do after you ask a question can reveal even more about you than the questions you ask. You reveal your true level of interest in the way you listen. Listen without interrupting or finishing others’ sentences, and direct your physical energy toward them—looking, leaning, and nonverbally responding to them.

• Be courteous. Good manners will be noticed and approved of, just as poor manners will work against one. In short, in the business world as well as elsewhere, good manners and consideration for others are timeless and those who recognize that will find themselves not only sought after and promoted, but more importantly, at ease in any social or business situation.

 By: Patricia Napier-Fitzpatrick

January 2024

Source: “THRIVE: The Ultimate Guide to Personal and Professional Success” by Patricia Napier-Fitzpatrick

“Be a yardstick of quality. Some people aren’t used to an environment
where excellence is expected.” 

  -      Steve Jobs

The same thoughtfulness you extend to your family and friends should be extended to those with whom you come into contact at the office. The essence of etiquette is courtesy, and the greatest courtesy you can exhibit at the office is to ensure that all your actions take into consideration the comfort and enjoyment of everyone around you; and to conduct yourself in a manner that makes the office a pleasant, productive place to work. When you show your coworkers, clients, and customers your best self, you set yourself apart from the competition and create long-lasting professional relationships.

Guidelines for professional business office decorum:

• Be on time.If you’re late on a regular basis, people will notice. While everyone has the occasional late morning, it’s not fair to your coworkers to feel the rules don’t apply to you. The same holds true for business meetings. It is never a good idea to arrive late for a business meeting. And never intentionally keep a client, or anyone else, waiting.

• Extend a friendly greeting.When greeting a new client or existing client at the office, it’s good form to address them by their name, make eye contact, give them a firm handshake, and make them feel welcome. If you already know the person, but others in your office don’t, it’s necessary to make the proper introductions. 

• Maintain appropriate conduct.If you are in a conservative business environment, your body language should be controlled and formal. There should be no laughter in the hallways, no walking around whistling and humming a tune, and no spontaneous outbursts of emotions or feelings.  If you’re in a casual business environment, your body language can be less controlled and more informal. It’s okay to laugh a bit and socialize a bit to build rapport when a more personal expression is acceptable as part of fulfilling business expectations. It doesn’t mean, however, that you can slack off or behave in a silly or immature manner.
• Dress appropriately for the office.Attire for the office has become more casual in many industries and companies, but it still requires attention to detail. Casual does not mean sloppy. The way you dress and groom yourself can not only change the way people view you, but also the way they listen to what you have to say. When you dress well, people take you more seriously. Pressed and fresh clothes, polished shoes or casual footwear that’s in good condition, a flattering haircut, and a well-tailored blazer would be a good start when you go back to the office this fall. 

• Keep your desk neat.Your desk or cubicle should be an extension of yourself. If it’s messy and cluttered, you’ll probably have difficulty locating necessary items. In addition, business associates will not regard you in a favorable light due to the untidiness of your workspace. No one likes to wait—particularly clients or senior management—while you attempt to unearth a missing item from under a mound of papers.

• Pay attention. Whether in a meeting, on the phone, or sitting in a coworker’s office, stay alert and pay attention. It’s bad form to be caught with your mind wandering, or checking your messages on your cell phone or PDA, and to have no clue as to what actually took place. Be a good listener and take notes. Don’t interrupt unless you absolutely have to.

• Avoid having lengthy personal conversations on the phone when others can hear you.No one wants to listen to you arguing with your husband or wife or telling your doctor about a health issue in great detail.

• Steer clear of personal habits that annoy.Even the smallest personal habit can appear magnified in a closed office setting. Things like constantly clearing your throat, blowing your nose, combing your hair every five minutes, doing your nails or putting on makeup at your desk, even taking vitamins—can be annoying and distracting to others and make a bad impression. Use the restroom for doing things that are best done in private.

• Ask before borrowing a coworker’s office supplies.Extend the same courtesy to others that you would expect from them. It is never a good idea to simply borrow whatever you’d like from another person’s desk without asking them first if it’s okay.

• Knock before entering a closed office or walking uninvited into a teammate’s cubicle.Always knock on a closed door, then wait until the person inside tells you to come in.  Although a cubicle may not have a door, do not assume it means you can walk into it without being invited. If you’ve just stopped by to chat, ask if it’s a good time. If someone stops by to chat with you when you’re in the midst of a project and don’t wish to be interrupted, be polite and let them know it isn’t a good time.

• Make small talk but avoid becoming overly involved in coworkers’ personal lives. It’s natural to be interested in your coworkers’ lives and want to be friends with some of them, but you should avoid becoming too involved. Be brief and discreet if you discuss personal issues at the office; remember, you’re there to be productive—not spend an inordinate amount of time socializing. However, spending some time exchanging pleasantries with your coworkers is advised since it will help build the rapport necessary for successfully working together.

• Avoid behavior that could be misconstrued.   At one time, a little harmless flirting or complimentary remarks about someone’s appearance might have been considered acceptable.  No longer. Now that there’s a heightened awareness of discrimination and harassment in the workplace, flirtatious comments and personal compliments may not be welcome by the recipient and could lead to your dismissal from the company.       

• Watch what you eat at your desk. Anything that’s going to offend others, such as food that has a strong odor, should be avoided at the office. If you’re in an area where others will see you eat, mind your manners. When you’re finished, throw away any leftover food and disposable containers in the appropriate waste can.  Nothing should be left on your desk; and you shouldn’t even eat at your desk if you sit in a public area where clients walk by.

• Follow the rules established for the office kitchen.   Unless the office refrigerator is stocked with complimentary food, do not assume anything you see in it is yours for the taking. If you didn’t put the food in it, it is not yours to eat.  Be sure to take your leftovers home or throw them out before they’re past their expiration date. And if you use the last cup of coffee in the coffee maker, tell the person whose job it is to make more. Clean up after yourself before you leave the kitchen.
• Be mindful of what you heat in the microwave or oven.Fish, for instance, is absolutely unacceptable. Anything that has a strong odor that can permeate the office should be avoided.
• Courtesy, consideration, and a respect for others are prime requisites for an office to function as a comfortable, safe and pleasant place to work.

 “The greater danger for most of us lies not in setting our aim too high and falling short; but in setting our aim too low and achieving our mark.”     -Michelangelo

The definitive checklist for everything new college graduates need to know and do to launch successful careers in the professional business world:  

1. Know the proper protocol for introducing yourself and others. Always have a pre-planned self-introduction for every interview and networking event you attend—one that will stimulate interest in you.

2. Shake hands with a firm grip, direct eye contact, and erect posture. Confident body language speaks volumes about your credibility as a person who is going places.

3. Suit up for success. Wear appropriate business attire and always make sure you are well-groomed when you go on a job interview or to a business meeting. Polished shoes translate to attention to detail. A polished appearance opens doors!

4. Cultivate a strong, clear speaking voice. Enunciate your words and do not use slang, foul language, or filler words. Knowing how to communicate clearly and effectively is essential to your success.

5. Polish your electronic and written communications, and your virtual presence.  Be professional: conduct yourself in a business-like manner at all times, using appropriate business language. Use correct spelling, grammar and punctuation. And today, it is critical to your success that you are able to present a polished and professional presence online for interviews and meetings.

6. Be professional when using your phone for business.

Always identify yourself when placing and answering a call. Be prepared to leave a voicemail when you place a call, since over half of all calls placed go to voicemail.

7. Know what is appropriate and what does not reflect positively on you when using your social networking tools. Every communication in both the virtual and real world is an opportunity to make a good impression.

8 Master the art of mingling, networking, and making small talk. Being skillful at mingling, networking, and small talk will not only help you get a job; it will also help you stand out in your new job.

9 Perfect your dining skills and table manners. You may be invited to have lunch with a potential employer so that he or she can observe your table manners. Demonstrating fine dining skills and stellar table manners greatly enhance your odds of landing a job.

10.  Demonstrate good manners at all times! Civility counts! People remember and are impressed with people who have good manners.

By: Patricia Napier-Fitzpatrick

        May 2022

Your clothes are a reflection of the person you are. By the selection of your attire, your control the narrative before you even say a word, because what you wear provides a significant amount of information about you. The way you dress and groom yourself can not only change the way other people view you, but also the way they listen to what you say. When you dress well, people take you more seriously. Coworkers will ask for your input more often and want you on their team. Dressing well will open doors for you. It can change your life. Dressing well isn’t just a confidence booster, it’s a personal choice—a lifestyle that helps like-minded people come together—whether it be through social media, in virtual meetings, or in-person at the office.

Although the younger generations seem to be okay with the idea that what you wear to work and what you do for work don’t have to be entwined; unfortunately, or fortunately, depending upon your point of view, older generations believe they are.  The decision about the expected attire for employees at a particular company is made by the company’s management team. Companies set their dress codes to fit their company culture and clients. For many companies, their dress codes are, and have been, even before the pandemic, in a state of flux. What used to be only a suit-and-tie culture, for example, for white-collar industries, is no longer the expected attire at many companies. Now, often a man can wear a jacket, long-sleeved dress shirt, and slacks without a tie to meetings with clients. 

A study by Recruitment International found 61% of employees are more productive when they work in a place with a relaxed dress code. Having an adaptable workplace dress code allows employees to be comfortable, creative and enjoy going to work. And, having a more relaxed dress code will help more traditional companies attract and retain the best talent from the younger generations. Whatever decision each company makes about its company’s dress code policy should be clearly communicated to its employees. Specified dress codes give employees certainty, which relieves much of the anxiety of dressing for work, making them feel more confident and productive at work.  

Many of you will be dressing more casually for work this fall, as well as the foreseeable future; nevertheless, there are certain standards to be maintained and important considerations to keep in mind when getting dressed for work. And although “comfortable” seems to be the main consideration for choosing one’s attire now, it is possible to dress casually, as well as comfortably, and still be stylish. “Comfort and style are not enemies,” according to image expert Eve Michaels.

Brands like Alex Mill, Tommy John, M.M. Lafleur, and Wolf and Shepherd have recently introduced an entire new category of workleisure to meet the demand for cozy, stretching clothes, creating comfortable work clothing for professional and business casual settings, including dresses, blouses and skirts for women and button down shirts, chino pants, overcoats and shirts for men. Other brands such as Lululemon, Ministry of Supply, Olivers Apparel, Evermore, and others are jumping on the workleisure bandwagon, making polished comfortable pieces for a work-play, hybrid  wardrobe. With all the brands now making these clothes, it should be possible for everyone to find work attire that is both comfortable and stylish.

Following are 10 tips for stepping up your style and grooming to look like a  polished professional:

1. MAINTAIN A PROFESSIONAL IMAGE.

Although casual clothes may be acceptable for your profession or company, casual does not mean sloppy. In their fit, brand, and style, clothes should signal that you take your work seriously.  Casual clothing deserves the same attention to detail as a traditional corporate wardrobe. Clothing should be clean, wrinkle-free, and without holes or frayed areas. And, like suits and tailored clothing, casual business wear lasts longer and looks better with some special care.

Dressing professionally in the workplace gives you credibility and shows that you fit in with the work environment. People don’t take you seriously until you look a certain way. By dressing appropriately for meetings, whether it be in the office or via Zoom video calls, you project a professional image and understanding of the business culture. Dressing professionally will give you credibility.

 2. LOOK LIKE YOU CARE HOW YOU LOOK.

“Carelessness seems to signal that you don’t respect your coworkers or yourself,” says Sylvia Ann Hewlett, author of ”Executive Presence.” “You certainly don’t respect the client if you show up with soup on your tie or bitten nails, anything to make you look unkempt.” And, whatever you wear for work–whether it be formal or casual attire–look like you have put some thought into your choice and how you might appear to others.  You don’t need to be a fashion plate to look stylish, but being up-to-date with trends signals your skills are up-to-date as well. 

3. PAY ATTENTION TO THE FIT OF YOUR CLOTHING.

It doesn’t matter how much you spend on an article of clothing if it does not fit you properly. Most men’s stores and department stores with men’s departments have tailors in-house. If you buy something online, you will need to go to a tailor. Many dry cleaners have tailors or seamstress on the premises.

 4. SPEND TIME ON GROOMING.

Poor grooming compromises the ability of other people to see you as someone who is going places because it says that either you don’t notice sloppiness, or you don’t care enough to attend to it. For the polished executive, shirts should be pressed; leather shoes should be shined; sneakers–if you wear them for work–should be clean and in good condition; hair should be cut in a flattering style; and men’s beards should be neatly trimmed for most professions. 

5. TAILOR YOUR LOOK TO THE SITUATION.

When you go for an interview, it’s always advisable to dress like the people who work there so they will see you as one of them. “If it’s Microsoft, it’s one outfit; in the US Army, it’s another,” says executive recruiter Russell Reynolds.  “You have to look like you belong to the group, and you have to look a little better than the group.” To do that, pattern yourself after someone who’s particularly good at dressing a bit better than the rest of the group. Online or offline interviews require the same consideration for your attire and grooming. 

 6. BE SELECTIVE FOR A SUCCESSFUL IMAGE.

Select attire that complements your coloring and body type; choose the right clothing and accessories for your business look; adopt meticulous grooming habits, and build a coordinated wardrobe that combines proper fit and quality construction. 

 7. LOOK THE PART BY DRESSING TO THE LEVEL YOU ASPIRE.

For executive-level, professional, white-collar industries, appropriate business attire consists of quality fabrics and conservative styling in subdued colors. For executive-level positions in fashion-related industries, quality fabrics are also important, but there is more flexibility with styling and color. Technology firms tend to be more casual in their dress than most industries, but there are nevertheless certain standards to be maintained. As you are making your way up the ladder, look like you belong on the level above your current one.

 8. DRESS FOR YOUR CLIENT.

As a general rule, always dress for your client. If you are meeting with an older, more traditional client, for example, and he always wears a suit and tie, you might want to consider wearing a suit and tie when you meet with him. If you are meeting with a more casual, younger client in the tech industry, you can leave your tie at home. Keep in mind you are not only making a statement about yourself by the way you dress, but also the company you represent. Does your attire accurately represent your brand?

 9. FOLLOW THE +1/-1 RULE.

Sylvie Di Giusto, author of  “The Image of Leadership,” recommends dressing one level higher than your current professional level, but not two levels up because you will look overdressed. And, “Never dress down more than one level because you want to dress like the leader you want to be.” If you follow the +1/-1 rule you never risk being underdressed or overdressed.

10. REINFORCE YOUR WINNNG IMAGE WITH CONFIDENT BODY LANGUAGE.

You can look the part of the stylish, polished professional, but if your bearing doesn’t match or isn’t in harmony with your image, you will not be credible, or viewed as a winner. Upright posture, direct eye contact, a confident, natural stride, a warm smile, and a firm handshake are needed to successfully communicate your message of being a winner, since people believe what they see. 

 By: Patricia Napier-Fitzpatrick 

September 2021

We are in the midst of the Coronavirus Pandemic; and we have been advised to avoid hugging, kissing or shaking hands when we see someone we know or meet someone for the first time. So, what would be the appropriate non-contact way to greet someone in the professional arena when we encounter them this fall?

First of all, smile and make direct eye contact with the person.  Even if you are wearing a mask, which hopefully you will be, a smile will evident.

Then, you have the following non-contact choices for what to do next instead of shaking their hand:

1. You can simply nod your head as you state your greeting: “Hello, Mr. Johnson. It is a pleasure to meet you.” Of course, if you are greeting an Asian business person, you might nod your head lower, only slightly bowing if you are not Asian. Bowing is a sign of respect in the Asian culture.

2. You can put your hand over your heart as you state your greeting. Many cultures associate this gesture with honesty. It indicates that one is not bearing arms—as does the handshake– or that one appears to have genuine intentions, or is giving one’s word of honor. Of course in the United States we put our hand over our heart when pledging allegiance to the flag.

3. You can use the respectful Hindu Namaste greeting, which is done by placing one’s palms together, fingers pointed upwards and drawing the hands to the heart, while bowing your head slightly.  It is not necessary to say Namaste unless you are Hindu. This is a greeting I have seen a number of world leaders use.

4. A gesture that works for all brains in all cultures, according to John Tierney, is the “no-fear greeting,” or “palm-show” cue.  It is done by bending your right forearm along your side and showing an open palm. Exposing an open-palm is a universally-recognized sign of nonaggression.

5. You can use the Vulcan Salute, although like the Namaste greeting when the word “Namaste” is uttered, it has a religious connotation. It is a Jewish symbol that comes from the Torah and means live long and prosper.  It is done by raising one’s hand, with space between the middle and ring fingers. and the index fingers and thumb. It was a greeting used by Mr. Spock in Star Trek.

6. Or lastly, you can wave at the person; but if you wave, be sure to restrain your wave unless waving at a friend; and by all means avoid using the royal/regal wave unless you are a member of the royal family.   Waving is a friendly, universally-understood gesture. I prefer this greeting for the social arena, rather than the professional arena, but it all depends on your particular business environment.  If it is less formal, this greeting would be fine. 

You will note I did not recommend elbow bumps. Although I have seen a number of political figures and global leaders use this greeting, it looks unprofessional to me; and according to the World Health Organization, they are too close for comfort. What elbow bumps do do is provide a bit of levity or comic relief to those who employ them; and in these stressful times that is not a bad thing.  

If you are in doubt as to which non-contact greeting to use, I recommend using the one your colleagues use to build rapport with them; or if you are a junior executive meeting a senior executive or have a job interview or meeting with a client, I recommend deferring to that person by adopting his or her preferred non-contact greeting. Of course, another factor to consider is if you are meeting a person from a different culture. That is why the handshake is so ideal and will be missed until contact greetings are safe again. It is the most appropriate, professional greeting that was hitherto used around the globe—a greeting that was never misunderstood.

In case you missed the wonderful segment this spring on the end of handshaking that appeared on “CBS Sunday Morning News,” below is the link to it. I was pleased to be interviewed for it.

https://www.cbsnews.com/video/the-end-of-the-handshake/#x

Stay safe and stay well!

Patricia

Patricia Napier-Fitzpatrick, August 2020