Tea & Etiquette
Tea & Etiquette with Her Majesty
”It’s all to do with the training: you can do a lot if you’re properly trained.”
- Queen Elizabeth II
As I am certain everyone must know, or at least imagine, Queen Elizabeth II loved afternoon tea. As a tribute to her, I have modified and am re-posting one of my previous posts regarding tea etiquette.
Reportedly, Her Majesty’s favorite tea was Earl Grey, served piping hot, with just a little milk added only after the tea had been poured. Along with her tea, she would have cake. Small cakes were served as well as a larger cake from which the Queen could cut a slice.
Worldwide, afternoon tea is a refreshing alternative to lunch or dinner. There is a timeless quality about “taking” tea. Afternoon tea conjures up feelings of elegance and gentility. Whether you are meeting friends, colleagues, or clients for tea, you will find that tea is a delightful and very pleasant way to build rapport–particularly on a cold, gloomy afternoon.
“To me, the ritualized exchange of courtesies at a tea gathering illustrates, in microcosm, the central role of etiquette in human life.”
-Dorothea Johnson, Author of “Tea & Etiquette: Taking Tea for Business and Pleasure”
Afternoon tea is served in every major city around the world now; and, of course, every hotel in London has an Afternoon Tea service, as well as Fortum & Mason, where one can also buy tins of tea to take home or give as gifts.
A trip to Paris would not be complete without going to Angelina’s for tea and pastries. I made my first visit to Angelina’s in my early 20s and go back every time I return to Paris. And then there is Vienna!
Although there are a number of noteworthy restaurants and hotels that serve afternoon tea in Manhattan, the Ritz Carlton Hotel on Central Park South is one of my favorites. The service, china, choices of tea, tea sandwiches, scones and sweets are all divine, and very “old world.” I would also recommend the Carlyle Hotel for adults who wish to meet for a quiet “respite” in the afternoon. Or, for incomparable views of the city and Central Park while “taking tea,” I highly recommend the Mandarin Oriental Hotel.
For special occasions, the best place in New York City to take children is the Palm Court at the Plaza Hotel. It is especially nice for young ladies now that they have an “Eloise” tea menu. Many also like Alice’s Tea Cup and Tea & Sympathy–my daughter’s favorite.
Everyone can enjoy the experience, but it helps to know how to properly do so. Following are some tips to guide you when “taking tea”:
Holding a teacup:
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A handled teacup is held with the index finger through the handle; the thumb just above it to support the grip, and the second finger below the hand for added security. The next two fingers should follow the curve of the other fingers.
Stirring a Cup of Tea:
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Stirring a cup of tea is done gently and noiselessly by moving the teaspoon in a small arc back and forth in the center of the cup. Do not allow the teaspoon to touch the sides of the rim of the cup.
Faux Pas:
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It is an affectation, or faux pas, to raise the pinkie finger.
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Lifting only the cup and leaving the saucer on the table when you are standing or when you there is only 12 inches between you and the table on which your cup and saucer are placed is a faux pas.
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Placing used accoutrements–cup, saucer, plate, flatware, or napkin– back on the tea table, once used, is a faux pas.
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Leaving a spoon upright in the cup.
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Placing the spoon on the saucer in front of the cup–it goes behind the cup, with the spoon pointing in the same direction as the handle of the cup.
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Making unnecessary noise by touching the sides of the cup with the spoon while stirring.
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Letting the spoon drop after stirring the tea with a clank onto the sauce.
Proper Tea Pouring:
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In general, pour the cup three-quarters full to prevent the tea from spilling.
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Never use cream; it masks the flavor of the tea. Use milk. (The habit of putting milk in tea originated in France: Madame de la Sabliere took her tea with milk because it was to her taste.)
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Add sugar first; otherwise, the lemon prevents it from dissolving.
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Never combine milk and lemon.
Drinking Tea:
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Look into, not over the cup of tea when drinking
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Drink your tea quietly–no blowing on it; and certainly, no slurping.